Lemons.

So I've had to deal with less than happy moments in life lately, nothing major, really petty actually...but things that bother(ed) me none-the-less. In the past, I would have let them eat away at me...get angry...feel helpless...lose hope...get frustrated...vent on LiveJournal...etc... but this time around, I have someone by my side who said, "the only thing that matters is that we're good. and we're really good."

Then I really put things in perspective. Maybe the situation upset me, maybe I worried about what I should DO, what action I should take, but it's so inconsequential that it's not worth worrying over. It's not worth building up the negative energy inside of me. And that approach changed everything for me. The solution is simple. That door is now closed. The consequences of this probably won't matter now, but someday when that door gets knocked at, it will be locked.

I have to say, so far through my life I haven't had any real regrets because I've always learned some valuable lesson from the less-than-happy situations or mistakes I've made, but this really made me reconsider. That mistake of giving too many "chances" opened the opportunity for all of this now, and I just shake my head because it's my own fault for not seeing this outcome sooner. Jake once told me 4 years ago that everything would change, things would get better and the talking, the rumors, the disrespect would stop. He insisted that I made good with the crapshooter and that things would improve. Well, I trusted him, that he saw something good in keeping these doors open. He was right up until this. He had much more faith that I did all along. So now, we're done. No more chances. The point of this paragraph was to share my epiphany that it's still not a complete regret because it has showed me how much of a wonderful man I am dating.

I'm sorry, I just can't be one of those superficially happy people who accepts anyone and everyone. I have an open heart, but when you're a terrible person, that doesn't apply to you. If you want to be friends, try having some integrity. Some respect. A backbone...

I have things to focus on- really exciting and life molding events coming up.

We're good, and that's all that matters. :)